Reservations About Reservations

The lowdown on restaurant reservation etiquette—and other oft-unspoken restaurant rules

Recently buzzing on X: A would-be patron last-minute canceled his reservation at a chic Boston restaurant due to a health emergency. When unable to obtain a refund directly, the diner reimbursed the whopping $250 cancellation fee via his credit card’s travel insurance. … End of story, right? 

Fast-forward to the patron receiving a snarky personal DM from the restaurant’s owner accusing him of “screwing over” her business and its staff (no, chef)—only erupting into further mayhem from there. While this scenario seems shockingly extreme, it sparks the discourse: How should patrons navigate the ever-evolving restaurant reservation scene—and what do Raleigh industry professionals have to say on the matter? 

If you think DM cancellations are acceptable, think again. Per a former restaurant industry professional: “The host is not hanging out on the company’s Instagram. If you DM them, save your breath—it’s the same as just not showing up.”

The Cancellation Fee Kerfuffle

The reviews are split. A lineup of well-known Raleigh restaurants charge a last-minute cancellation fee (think Mulino, AC Restaurants and St. Roch) while others elect to waive the charge and cut their losses if patrons flake. 

“We try to be understanding of people’s ever-changing and busy schedules, so we don’t charge cancellation fees,” says Scott Crawford of his policy for parties of four or less. “[But] diners should be aware that not showing up or calling to cancel really does hurt small businesses. We understand plans change—and having communication allows us to pivot and achieve our revenue goals.” 

Meanwhile, DTR’s cool Mexican cantina Centro maintains a charge of $10 per guest for a no-show or cancellation with less than 24 hours notice. “There is a huge impact if someone reserves a table during peak hours and doesn’t show up,” says chef Angela Salamanca. “But if someone calls to cancel because they’re sick, we don’t charge. We aren’t in the business of cancellation fees—we want people to come dine with us.”

North Raleigh outpost Cucciolo Terrazza currently opts for no fee for small groups but does require a credit card on file for parties of 10+ due to additional setup, extra staff and more food prep. “A table for two to four is easy for us to fill with a walk-in,” explains Director of Operations Andrew Robinson. “But larger tables are limited—and without sufficient cancellation notice, we are left without time to reach out to other parties and offer them the space.” 

Party Size in Flux

Managing dinnertime reservations can be compared to a “good game of Tetris,” according to Giorgios Hospitality Group, due to the tedious task of continuously optimizing flow throughout the night based on arrivals and departures. That said, if you realize your group is shifting in size, it’s always good to give a heads up ASAP. 

That sentiment seems to stay true across the board. “If your party changes, we will try to accommodate that,” notes Salamanca. “It’s an unideal curve because we’ve already set the floor—but we always try to make it work. [That said],  I really appreciate when people call.”

Courtesy Calls

A good rule of thumb: Communication is key. If you realize ahead of time your dinner party is shifting in size, you’re running late or need to abort your meal plans altogether, tell the restaurant. It’ll assist a smooth run-of-show, allow time to readjust seating arrangements or open up a spot for walk-in patrons. 

“If you show up 15 minutes late and there are people waiting, your table is gone,” says a longtime hostess. “There are exceptions: If you call and explain extenuating circumstances—you give time [for us] to rework the plan and ensure everyone can still get in efficiently.” 

Ultimately, when you book a rez, a restaurant is planning for your butt—and business—to be in that seat. So show up, enjoy a good meal, support a local spot (and avoid the aforementioned social media war…)—and everybody wins.