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Dear Chaos Coordinators,
Quick Q: When did we collectively decide every minuscule thought deserves a full audience?
If you’ve ever thrown your phone—or straight turned it off—when a side chat hijacks the group thread, then you know. There’s nothing—and I mean nothing—more derailing to a workday, dinner or chill time than watching a perfectly functional group text spiral into a two-person side convo.
You know the one. Twelve people on the thread, and suddenly it’s two texters workshopping logistics or inside jokes that apply to exactly no one else. Meanwhile, the rest are held hostage to buzzing phones and wrist taps we didn’t sign up for. It’s not cute—and frankly, no one cares. It’s a shared space—act accordingly.
Brass tacks: If it involves one person, take it off the thread. No “one more message.” Otherwise, it’s the digital equivalent of whispering across the dinner table while everyone else just sits there. And, yes, it’s just as rude.
And another thing! About the call vs. text crisis: There’s a system—respect it. If your call could’ve been a text, it should’ve been a text. If your text turns into a call without warning, I’ll assume something’s wrong.
If your text turns into a novel—or requires thought or follow-up—that’s what email’s for. And about email: Somehow, we’ve lost the plot. Please don’t reply all “thank you.” Period. That’s a private sentiment—keep it private. In fact, let’s simplify: If you’re unsure whether to email, don’t. … But do use email for what it’s meant for—context, clarity or length. The gray area is not that gray. You’re just avoiding basic text etiquette.
And—this feels foundational but is somehow a full-blown comms crisis—if someone is cc’d, they need to be looped in. So when you reply only to sender, you’re undoing the entire point.
And before I sign off—my name is in the email. Right there. Spelled all nice and correctly. If you can’t spell it, I’m not confident you read anything else—and I will proceed accordingly.
It’s not that complicated. It just requires baseline brain waves and a little awareness that lately feels… optional. It’s not. Respect the thread, respect the inbox. And maybe—just maybe—we can all get our sanity back.
—Sorry not sorry
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