NC Has Some of the Strictest Divorce Laws in the Country

NC’s unique divorce laws are under fire—and could change soon.

In North Carolina, breaking up is hard to do—at least legally speaking. It’s one of few states that requires spouses to live separate and apart for at least a year and a day before an absolute divorce can be granted, putting NC among a relatively small group of states that mandate lengthy separation periods for no-fault divorces.

Now, a proposed law would cut that wait in half—and eliminate it altogether in certain circumstances.

Introduced in April, the Domestic Violence Divorce Reform Act would reduce NC’s required separation period from one year to six months, also waiving the six-month period if both spouses agree, the divorce is uncontested and there are no minor children. 

The bill would also waive the separation period entirely for those seeking divorce from a spouse who has committed domestic violence, provided the applicant submits specified documentation of abuse—and further eliminate NC’s alienation-of-affection and criminal-conversation lawsuits, which allow certain civil claims against third parties over marital affairs.

But there’s an important distinction: The waiting period doesn’t prevent spouses from physically separating or beginning to resolve custody, support and property matters. It delays when the marriage can legally end. And some financial claims must be filed before a divorce becomes final to preserve those rights. 

The current waiting period has been a hot-button issue for years, proving to be more than legal fine print. For NC labor and delivery nurse and influencer Jen Hamilton, that waiting period suddenly became a media frenzy this year when she publicly alleged her now-estranged husband of more than a dozen years had been leading a “double life.”

“I think a lot of North Carolinians do not know they will be affected by this ‘year and a day’ law,” emphasizes Hamilton. “A lot of us aren’t aware until it affects us personally. There’s a lot of financial and custody implications that affect both parties, children and the family as a whole.” Hamilton argues shortening the separation period could ease that transition—and that requiring someone to remain legally married can be especially dangerous when abuse is involved.

“These changes in laws will save lives,” Hamilton said. “Being able to leave an unhealthy or abusive marriage will save lives.”

Not everyone is on board, however. Raleigh family law specialist Jaime Davis—author of  the book A Year and a Day—argues the separation period gives couples time to sort through custody, child support, property division and alimony.

And it’s not just about the paperwork. “Some folks don’t even really know for sure that they want to be [divorced] for several months,” Davis said in an April podcast interview, noting that some couples reconcile during that time. “The year is really useful because it gives folks long enough to figure out the financial issues, but also the emotional issues of ‘is this the right decision for me.’”

For now, the proposed changes remain just that. The bill has seen no recorded legislative action since its April committee referral. But regardless of whether NC ultimately shortens the wait, both Hamilton and Davis underscore one important consideration: Whether you’re entering or exiting a marriage, having your finances in order—and maintaining an ability to support yourself—matters.